as you wish

Someone knocked on the door.

It was Jurt. He had the scanner box under his arm and a fishy expression on his face. I relaxed my shoulders and nodded at him, and made eye contact, and waited for him to speak.

He said, “I’ve put the ‘Bird in one of the outbuildings. It’s out of sight, at least.”

“Good. Thank you. Would you like a sandwich?” Ha. See how I triumph over you, monkey brain.

Jurt stopped eyeballing the inside of my bedroom. He glanced down. He blinked. “No, I thank you.”

“Okay then.” I said, “I want you to check over our security system and see if we’re compromised anywhere. The red console in the den downstairs. Last door on the right. The passcode is pi to the eighth digit, entered in reverse order.”

Jurt had been looking at me very intently. He waited a couple of breaths after I finished speaking–one, why? and two, annoying–then he said, “Very well.”

Sam and I both sat there, hearing him go down the hallway, pause at the top, and then start down the stairs. They creaked under his weight.

I said, “That’s a gamble.”

“Maybe.” Sam said. I looked at him. And then I had to look away. And I wasn’t really sure why.

Overheard: chatterbox edition

“OK! Well, I won’t keep you, I know you’re real busy, takin’ care of business…scooping poop…”
“Oh yeah. And that guy, and that guy? They poop a lot. Look at them. Looking innocent. (baby/dog voice) Oh, who me, I’m innocent. They were on the roof yesterday […] […] […]”
“Well, S, that’s hilarious. It was great talking with you–”
“Yeah! You’re welcome out here any time. Even if you just want to hang out and hey, maybe help scoop poop […] […] […]”
“S, I’m gonna get out of your hair now. I’ve taken up way too much of your time already. It was great speaking to you.”
“Oh, yeah. You’ve have to go…off to another adventure :)”
“Well…starting with lunch, yeah.”
“Oooo, nice, what’s lunch gonna be?

“She is a shrewd little b….usiness woman.”

“Handicat, get out of there!”
“She has three legs.”
“Good name for a three-legged cat.”

“That’s Hilda. I think she’s bipolar. She’s sweet in the morning and she’s hateful in the afternoon.”

“The cat’s bipolar. She’s sweet in the morning and she’s hateful in the afternoon.”
“I heard that one….did it seem like there was any self-awareness there?”

Poetry Corner – Recompense

I have not heard lutes beckon me, nor the brazen bugles call,
But once in the dim of a haunted lea I heard the silence fall.
I have not heard the regal drum, nor seen the flags unfurled,
But I have watched the dragons come, fire-eyed, across the world.

I have not seen the horsemen fall before the hurtling host,
But I have paced a silent hall where each step waked a ghost.
I have not kissed the tiger-feet of a strange-eyed golden god,
But I have walked a city's street where no man else had trod.

I have not raised the canopies that shelter revelling kings,
But I have fled from crimson eyes and black unearthly wings.
I have not knelt outside the door to kiss a pallid queen,
But I have seen a ghostly shore that no man else has seen.

I have not seen the standards sweep from keep and castle wall,
But I have seen a woman leap from a dragon's crimson stall,
And I have heard strange surges boom that no man heard before,
And seen a strange black city loom on a mystic night-black shore.

And I have felt the sudden blow of a nameless wind's cold breath,
And watched the grisly pilgrims go that walk the roads of Death,
And I have seen black valleys gape, abysses in the gloom,
And I have fought the deathless Ape that guards the Doors of Doom.

I have not seen the face of Pan, nor mocked the Dryad's haste,
But I have trailed a dark-eyed Man across a windy waste.
I have not died as men may die, nor sin as men have sinned,
But I have reached a misty sky upon a granite wind.

- Robert E. Howard

This misses out being my favorite Howard piece because, evocative and strong as it is, but it ends weak without pulling the strands together. Who speaks? Where–beyond the realms of imagination–is he? I, too, wish to know of the road to this far, fantastic place…

misc snippet

“That story you told me…does it end with Nourali shouting at Mororra, ‘Come down, come down and I will send you to Hell?’

Jurt hesitated. (What was it with people taking long pauses before they answered us, these days?) “Not in my version.”


“Do you happen to recall if __ keeps her records in a computer system like…what’s her name…the spaniels lady.”
“The spaniels lady…”
“With the Cocker Spaniels and the attitude.”
“Oh, E!”

[Have you ever seen an ostrich defecate up close? Yeah, I thought not.]

Shadow and Bone? I started to watch it and then I think I watched like three minutes of it and then I was like, ‘this is stupid’ and I turned it off. I think I was in a grumpy mood that day. But that guy in it is good-looking.”
“He is hot. Ben Barnes as Prince Caspian? Hot. Ben Barnes as whats-his-name, the Darkling? Hot. Ben Barnes as anything? Hot. He is my type, alllll the way down.”
“….I’m gonna have to give that another shot, aren’t I.”
“Watch it for Ben Barnes’ butt.” [direct quote]

“So what do you actually do with the ostrich?”
“Right now we mostly look at him.”