The captain continued to study him. “Then why?”
“There’s a girl,” Jack admitted. “–she thinks I’m a hero.” Despite everything, he found he was smiling, just at the memory, just at the thought. “She thinks there is nothing I cannot do.”
[answering phone] “Good….uh…hm…uhhhh…noon.”
“Hah, I wondered what you were going to come up with!”
“I checked and it was 12:00 exactly, so–”
“As soon as you said it, I wondered to myself what she was gonna say! I’m gonna use that one later.”
“Did you just steal my nice pen?”
“It’s not that nice!”
“Okay, I need to potty and I assume you’re gonna want something to eat.”
“So that’s a yes then.”
[answering phone] “Hellooo?”
“Hyello, good morn–is it still morning?”
“Um….yes it is.”
“Okay. I squeaked that in. G’mornin.'”
The area my parents are from has an industry based on three things: cows, chickens, and flea markets. That being said, it does pay to patiently check all the bookshelves when you browse your way through:
- The Conquest of Mexico – Bernal Diaz del Castillo
- The Horse and His Boy – C. S. Lewis (apparently I’m assembling a Narnia collection piecemeal)
- Hank the Cowdog: The Case of the Double Bumblebee Sting – E. Erickson (to be delivered to the homeschool group, which will ignore it because those kids are hopeless.)
We also watched:
- Oblivion (2013) – For a non-scifi person, The Mother of Skaith is rather surprisingly good at picking out the influences of one movie and another.
- “They stole that from Star Trek!”
- “This is like that other movie! The one with Sean Bean and whats-his face!”
- “When was this made?”
- No Time to Die (2021) – I have several thoughts about this movie.
- The Mother of Skaith had thoughts about this movie, too, and they are:
- “I do not like him as James Bond! He is an ugly person!”
- “That is not Q! That little student person is Q? Q should be a distinguished figure.”
- “What! James Bond does not have a child! That is not Bond.”
“He probably has multiple kids, you know.”
“James Bond does not have kids.”
- Anyhow, this isn’t a very good James Bond movie. It’s an okayish “grizzled ex-spy gets pulled in for One Last Job” movie, but that still leaves it with some fundamental structural problems.
- It’s aimed at a female audience. Female audiences are interested in things like feelings, emotional speeches, characters making emotional connections with each other, and families. They aren’t interested in things like: spycraft, cars, motorcycles, helicopters, gunfights (loud), tactical weapony procedural stuff (boring), problem solving under pressure (scary!), or stuff blowing up (ugh, come on). That stuff is boring, and they like to skip past it as quickly as possible to get back to the good stuff.
- Mind, having emotional connections and character growth in your movie is good stuff, don’t mistake. Fights do get boring when there aren’t any personal stakes involved–such as people that we care about being endangered….and we have to legitimately care about them. My personal favorite action scene in the movie is where Bond attempts to draw off pursuit from his love interest and daughter. Bond legitimately cares about these people, and so, consequently, do we.
- Bond and Paloma taking a moment for drinks in the middle of a gunfight was also a nice classic-film-Bondish moment.
- The fundamental structural problem with skipping to the good stuff is that the conflicts are set to “easy mode.” The climax of the movie is Bond trying to a) stop the bad guy, b) rescue his family. a) is pretty simple. b) should require some effort, as both love interest and kid are in separate places under guard. But easy mode kicks in and all three manage to wander into each other without having to think, plan, ask questions, or work towards it as a goal.
- It does not integrate the required male-audience interest stuff well enough to make it a truly unisex viewing experience. If it had it would have been….quite a lot better. And it is possible, at least in my opinion.
- Seven Swords (2005) is a wuxia movie that is extremely female-audience-oriented. It’s got handsome guys with long flowing hair; shirtless scenes; elaborate costumes; at least two love triangles, one of which is a not-too-bad-looking villain obsessively in love with one of the main characters and the other of which is star-crossed; the action scenes are pretty much all filmed from the POV of the female characters as per the director’s commentary; not to mention that there are multiple well-written, female characters to begin (and end) with. And there’s oodles of wuxia violence, sword fights, fist fights, sword fights with weird swords, fights with weird weapons, fights on horseback, fights upside down between walls, fights where everything is on fire….and so on. So it is possible. (Is a very good movie.)
I also watched:
- Two Weeks Notice (2002) because I’m still recovering from sickness, OKAY
- Hugh Grant is actually really good here, making his upper class twit character a charming, intelligent upper class twit. Sandra Bullock is also good; her part is rather obnoxiously written but she makes herself completely likable. Unfortunately, after the first fifteen minutes or so, the script loses headway and never really makes it back up.
“Do you know what other games I like?”
“….that is also a good game.”
was pretty funny.
Tall Bear said: “You give generously for a man with empty hands.”
Alberich had borne his scabbarded sword into the gathering place, easy in the crook of his arm; he had passed it to the Wolf Boy before entering the council circle. His hands were currently beneath his cloak, as if he sheltered from the cold. He said: “I am a man, Tall Bear, and I speak to you as a man. My vassals, I order. A free man, I do not coerce or command. A free man chooses what he will do, and where he will go, if will profit him–or because he is asked, and it pleases him to answer.” And with this, withdrawing his hands, he revealed a sealed letter. “Tall Bear, I ask you now to be my messenger. Take my word to that whelp, the younger Jalra, that he may know to whom he will bend the knee.”
“Baby, I am one hundred percent sure you should not be eating leaves. [removes leaf] ….and don’t look at me like that!”
“Hahaha, her dad is a redhead.”
“Sounds like hell.”
“Oh, gir–what did you say?”
“I said, that sounds awful.”
“Oh, I thought you said ‘that sounds so ghetto,’ and I was gonna say, oh girl, this is S__!”
“What a picturesque town. I’m glad I don’t live here.”
“He shot them dogs.”
“Yes he did. But he wasn’t going to tell you that.”
“Yeah he was, which was why I didn’t ask.”
“She’s a therapist for the Marines. And a bodybuilder. The Marines who come to her office are scared of her.”
“Well, as long as she’s got a good selection of crayons…”
AND Ishmael crouched beside a crackling briar
Blinded with sand, and maddened by his thirst,
A derelict, though he know not why accursed.
And lo! One saw, and strung the dissonant lyre,
Made firm his bow unto the arrow's spire,
And gave him dates and wine. Then at the first
Flushings of dawn Ishmael arose, and burst
To triumphing freedom, ran, and eased desire.
His domain was the desert. None tamed him.
None bought or sold his spirit, though his hand
Dripped red against the dawn and sunset stain.
Thrones melted, kingdoms passed to the world's rim.
But Ishmael scourged the lion in Paran land,
And kept his faith with God. And he will reign.
- Herbert Edward Palmer
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