Or spoken: oodles

“I got your mother to read half an article on the Singularity.”

“Luckily, she is married to a superman who is not affected by temperature changes.”

“How old is that person?”
“I don’t know, you can’t tell with these people!”
You can’t tell.”
“They start complaining when they’re fifty and then they continue complaining until they’re seventy!”

“I shouldn’t badmouth women–but–”

“And these are my sheltipoos–”
“My sheltipoos :)”
“They’re mixed? With Poodles?”
“Oh, no! No, no, no. I think if I want a mixed breed dog, I’ll go to the pound.”
“So….’poo’ in this case is–?”
“Pooch? Poochie? Poopsie?”
“Oh, okay. You had me worried there for a second.”
“Well, it’s just a nickname. I call my Great Danes my Danapoos.”